…and what do I think of it?
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As I’ve mentioned several times on our podcast, my family and I took an 8-day trip to Walt Disney World in late January, and I would be remiss if I didn’t share my opinions on our first trip to Disney World post-reopening. We got to try out almost all of the new attractions and experiences, revisit many of the old standbys, and even got to see my old friend and podcast co-host, Amanda.
Let’s start with how this all happened…
It was mid-spring of 2021 when my wife told me that she was planning another Disney World trip. About a decade ago, after I had lost my job and my girlfriend at the time, I had sworn that I would return to Disney World in time for their 50th anniversary. Of course, I had planned on getting another job and moving back there, but as Dr. Ian Malcolm reminds us:
“Life breaks free. Life expands to new territories. Painfully, perhaps even dangerously. But life finds a way.”
— Jurassic Park, 1990, by Michael Crichton
My life reconnected me with an old school friend. We started dating, fell in love, and became a family together with her two boys, living in her grandparents’ old house less than 50 miles from where I grew up.
Conveniently, Disney World’s 50th anniversary celebration coincided with my 40th birthday. Her plan was to celebrate my birthday in my favorite place with my favorite people. We had missed out on several things I was excited about on our last trip, specifically Rise of the Resistance (which had opened the day before we visited Disney’s Hollywood Studios that trip and we were unable to get Boarding Passes).
She rented Disney Vacation Club points and we ended up staying nine days and eight nights at Disney’s BoardWalk Villas. We booked our meals and park days — two days for each park — and awaited news of the return of FastPass and the Dining Plan. Obviously, we know how those turned out by now.
So with all of that out of the way, let’s get into everything that’s new, and my opinions on them, starting with the heffalump in the room:
Genie, Genie+, and Lightning Lane
I would be lying if I claimed that I didn’t see this one coming. Even in my previous blog about how I would fix FastPass, I acknowledged that Disney was the last holdout in the theme park industry for paid express queueing. Universal has charged for it for over 20 years, and both Busch and Six Flags park franchises have some form of monetized FastPass-like system. Disney moving away from the “included with park admission” system was, unfortunately, inevitable.
We purchased Genie+ for both Magic Kingdom days, one Hollywood Studios day, and one Animal Kingdom day. We also purchased Individual Lightning Lane passes for any attraction we hadn’t done before, and a handful of others. The process was pretty quick and painless for the most part, although certainly not cheap, especially for the five of us.
Since we didn’t purchase Genie+ ahead of time, we only paid for the days we felt it necessary. Genie+ works very similarly to FastPass 1.0 in that you can only get passes on the day you’re in the park, but you can book as many passes as you can get in for one day, and you do it from literally anywhere using the mobile app. You can only hold one Genie+ pass at a time, but once you reach the end of your cooldown period, you can book another. On a few occasions, we were able to book several Lightning Lanes back-to-back, meaning we would get in line for one attraction, book a Lightning Lane for a nearby attraction for about 15 minutes later, then get off that attraction and walk to the next just in time to redeem that Lightning Lane and book another.
Because of this, we were able to experience most attractions with little-to-no wait. If there was a gap between Lightning Lanes, we could usually fill it with snacks or sleeper attractions. For example, after riding Peter Pan’s Flight one day, we were able to sit by the Tangled restrooms, eat a couple of funnel cakes, then sit through the Country Bear Jamboree and the Enchanted Tiki Room while we waited for our Jungle Cruise Lightning Lane to open up.
It was beneficial to check the online Tip Board regularly. On several occasions, we were able to grab Lightning Lanes for earlier in the day than had been available prior due to other guests canceling theirs. My oldest son and I were able to ride Space Mountain together one afternoon when a slot opened up for five minutes from the time I checked.
Now, the Individual Lightning Lanes — that is, the paid extra ones that are not included with Genie+ — are a double-edged sword. Individual Lightning Lanes cost extra but don’t count against your limit. You can book several Individual Lightning Lanes at a time for any available attraction and still be able to book your one-at-a-time Genie+ Lightning Lane. As one would expect, Individual Lightning Lanes are offered for the most popular E-ticket attractions of the park. Currently, each park has two:
- Magic Kingdom:
- Space Mountain
- Seven Dwarfs Mine Train
- Epcot:
- Frozen Ever After
- Remy’s Ratatouille Adventure
- Disney’s Hollywood Studios:
- Star Wars: Rise of the Resistance
- Mickey and Minnie’s Runaway Railway
- Disney’s Animal Kingdom:
- Expedition Everest
- Avatar: Flight of Passage
Individual Lightning Lane prices ranged from $9 to $15 per person per pass during our stay, with the cheapest being Space Mountain on a weekday and the most expensive being Rise of the Resistance on a weekend. For the five of us to guarantee a ride on Rise of the Resistance meant plopping down $75+tax. All Lightning Lane passes are limited, of course, so to ensure we got any at all meant waking up at 7am almost every morning, checking availability, and purchasing whatever was available as soon as possible. Supposedly more passes are made available later in the day, but I cannot confirm or refute this based on my experience.
The plus side to all of this rigamarole is that for every attraction we used Lightning Lane, we had little-to-no wait. Sometimes we literally walked onto attractions. Usually, we would get in on the next available vehicle or preshow. Lightning Lane often had its own entrance as well, so we didn’t have to merge with the unwashed masses of the standby queue (I kid, I kid).
But the real question is, was Genie+/Lightning Lane worth it?
Well, for the most part, yes, it actually was. Traveling with my elderly mother-in-law and two impatient children, the ability to jump from one attraction to another almost instantly without long waits in between meant that not only did we get to see and do most of what we wanted, but the kids were also rarely bored. The spontaneity of Genie+ meant that we didn’t have to adhere to a preset schedule determined by only one or two of us months ago (as was the case with FastPass+). The ability to purchase Genie+ or an Individual Lightning Lane on a day-to-day basis meant we didn’t need to spend the money on days we didn’t need it. The Individual Lightning Lanes also ensured that we were able to ride all the newest and coolest attractions, despite their insanely long wait times.
Now, that’s not to say that it isn’t a transparently classist feature. Giving guests the option to skip most lines by paying more money benefitted us because we saved and prepared for it; but to families who can’t afford the additional hundred dollars a day or so — and to passholders, cast members, and other frequent visitors — it’s another unnecessary added expense. On one occasion, we found ourselves waiting in a standby queue for over an hour-and-a-half, double the posted wait time, while Lighting Lane holders were piled onto the attraction at what felt like two of them to every one of us.
With the exception of highly unbalanced situations like that one, in general, I see this as an equalizer. Since my family can only afford to visit once every couple of years, we can splurge and get the most out of the trip. Someone who has the option to come back next week, next month, or even more than once a year may not be able to justify the added expense, but they also don’t have as much need to do everything this visit when they’ll be back again soon to do whatever they missed.
If you don’t visit often, can’t visit for long, and/or can afford the extra money, I recommend fully utilizing Genie+ and Lightning Lane. If you’re a local, on a limited budget, have a prohibitively large group, and/or don’t care about waiting in line for the things you most want to see, feel free to save your money.
Major Attraction Updates
A little over a year ago, Disney announced updates to the Jungle Cruise attractions in Disneyland and the Magic Kingdom. Not unlike the updates to Pirates of the Caribbean a few years ago, the goal of these updates was to remove culturally inappropriate scenes and gags, in addition to adding references to the in-park expanded universe, the S.E.A.: Society of Explorers and Adventurers. Among the changes are the removal of the pile of headhunter skulls, the war-dancing natives (as well as their subsequent attack), and Trader Sam. The “lost safari” have been changed to a racially diverse group of characters who all have a role in the S.E.A. There have also been a couple of new scenes added in addition to the ones that replaced the removed ones, including a self-deprecating reference to the Jungle Cruise boat that sunk a couple of years ago.
The new scenes and jokes have been incorporated flawlessly into the attraction. New animatronics are the same somewhat primitive style as the originals, and new faces have a definite Marc Davis inspired design. At times, I wasn’t sure something was missing until we were well past where it used to be. All of the best gags have survived, and for an attraction that prides itself on its re-rideability, something new always helps keep things fresh.
Also of note was The Hall of Presidents, which reopened last fall with a new film and an Audio-Animatronic of current President Joe Biden. I hadn’t seen the show since 2011, so I cannot compare it to the previous version, but it definitely felt shorter, almost rushed. The Civil War, previously a major part of the film, is brushed over, and the debate between Abraham Lincoln and Stephen A. Douglas was cut entirely. Lincoln still reads the Gettysburg Address, but using the 2017 J. V. Martin recording rather than the far superior recitation by Lincoln’s original voice actor, Royal Dano, from the 2009 version (even Peter Renaday, who voiced Lincoln from 1993 to 2008 would have been preferable). Unlike every other sitting President since Bill Clinton in 1993, Biden does not deliver a unique speech but instead recites the Oath of Office before the show abruptly ends.
image source: USA Today
Last, and probably least, was the new CircleVision movie at Epcot’s Canada Pavilion, Canada Far and Wide. Whereas the previous film, O Canada!, was all about Canada as a whole, Far and Wide divides the country into its individual provinces, and focuses on each of its major cities. While I found this movie more informative than O Canada!, the second version of O Canada!, hosted by Martin Short, was more entertaining. Far and Wide’s narration, provided by Short’s fellow Second City comedians and stars of CBC’s Emmy-winning sitcom Schitt’s Creek, Catherine O’Hara and Eugene Levy, is disappointingly dry. This is unfortunate, as World Showcase movies aren’t much of a draw to begin with. A few good jokes might have made this one worth a second viewing, and with the upcoming Wondrous China planned to be a seamless CircleVision 360º movie, Canada Far and Wide will end up being overshadowed with its inferior nine-projector presentation.
Trackless Dark Rides
In the past couple of years, the number of trackless dark rides at the Walt Disney World Resort has increased from zero to three. Formerly, this ride system has been exclusive to Disney Parks outside of the United States (with the exception of its prototypes, Universe of Energy, The Great Movie Ride, and The Twilight Zone Tower of Terror). Rise of the Resistance at Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge brought these innovative attractions to our shores, followed closely by Mickey and Minnie’s Runaway Railway and Remy’s Ratatouille Adventure.
All of these attractions may share a mode of transportation, but each is a wholly unique experience in and of itself. Let’s start by examining the unique aspects of this vehicular presentation.
The trackless dark ride is exactly what it says on the box. The individual ride vehicles resemble those found in a classic carnival or Fantasyland dark ride, with two rows accommodating three or four guests each. As the name implies, these vehicles are neither on a track nor in an OmniMover chain. They appear to be completely free-wheeling. While they are controlled by a series of onboard computers and RFID pucks embedded in the attraction floor, the lack of visible guide rails or a pre-set path provides an element of randomness and an out-of-control feeling. Add to that the fact that the vehicles themselves are surprisingly quick and agile, and you’ve got a truly wild ride that would make even Mr. Toad turn green.
image source: Disney Wiki, ©Disney
The first of its kind opened in 2000 at Tokyo Disneyland as Pooh’s Hunny Hunt. Essentially a trackless remake of The Many Adventures of Winnie the Pooh attraction that premiered in Walt Disney World’s Magic Kingdom with much more elaborate animatronics. Thirteen years later, Hong Kong Disneyland opened the second ride using the same system, Mystic Manor, a completely unique and original attraction that incorporates elements of The Haunted Mansion, The Enchanted Tiki Room, and the S.E.A.
But since those are still exclusive to their Asian parks, let’s start with the first of its kind to come to America, Remy’s Ratatouille Adventure. Although the last to open here, Ratatouille: L’Aventure Totalement Toquée de Rémy debuted in Disneyland Paris’ second gate, Walt Disney Studios Paris, in 2014. The Epcot version found in the World Showcase’s France Pavilion is an exact duplicate of the Paris version, albeit in English.
In it, you are shrunk down to the size of a rat — or rather ~16.7% the size of a rat, as up to six of you will be riding on/in a vehicle shaped like a small rodent. From the load area, you are let loose in a kitchen full of oversized props, physical effects, and giant 3D projections. If you’ve ever ridden The Amazing Adventures of Spider-Man at Universal’s Islands of Adventure, you’ll have some idea what you’re in for. A mischief of four rat-cars scurries around haphazardly in all directions, often splitting up into different paths and regrouping in the next large room, narrowly avoiding hazards and capture at every turn. Sometimes the combination of visual and physical effects disorients your senses into thinking you’re moving when you’re actually not, much like Soarin’ or Avatar: Flight of Passage.
The next of these attractions chronologically is Star Wars: Rise of the Resistance — although it should be noted that Rise of the Resistance is much more than just a dark ride. Set vaguely in the sequel trilogy era (though based on Kylo Ren’s depiction, an exact time period cannot be determined — you’re best off considering this a non-canon side-story à la Star Tours), you are Resistance fighters recruited by Rey to rendezvous with General Leia Organa for an important mission. On your way, your ship is captured by a First Order Star Destroyer and you are forced to escape with the help of Finn, Poe, and a reprogrammed astromech droid steering a fleet transport vehicle.
Rise of the Resistance has easily the most immersive and elaborate preshow of any attraction, to say nothing of the ride itself. Beginning in a pretty standard briefing room with a BB-8 animatronic and a “holographic” projection of Daisy Ridley as Rey, you are led into a motion simulator vehicle that’s something between a subway train car and a significantly toned down Star Tours. Once you’re captured, you exit this ship (via the same door you entered, mind you) into a massive hangar full of animatronic Stormtroopers and cast members acting as First Order officers, complete with haughty faux-British accents. You are divided up into groups (for your ride vehicle), then led into an interrogation room where General Hux and Kylo Ren attempt to extract the location of the Resistance base.
Your captors are forced to leave moments before Resistance fighters break you free. Here is where you finally board your trackless vehicles and the real ride begins. I won’t spoil anything here, suffice to say that your transports zoom around the Star Destroyer interior, encountering Stormtroopers, full-sized AT-AT Walkers, robotic laser cannons, numerous projection and lighting effects, and at least one convincingly realistic Audio-Animatronic of Kylo Ren (two, if the show-stopping A-1000 figure is operational). During your escape, your vehicle will zip around forwards and backward, effortlessly entering and exiting a high-speed elevator, a drop shaft, and a motion simulator, all while nimbly weaving around blaster shots, lightsabers, and giant mechanical weapons of destruction.
The trackless vehicles ensure that your experience will not always be exactly the same. During our two rides, we found ourselves narrowly avoiding a probe droid one time, sneaking behind the AT-ATs another time, and dodging a seemingly random and spontaneous barrage of laser blasts.
Finally, there is Mickey and Minnie’s Runaway Railway. Runaway Railway pulls a fun little bait-and-switch on unsuspecting guests by starting the ride out as a slow-moving train. In a scene not dissimilar to The Great Movie Ride’s opening, your train, driven by Goofy, moves slowly into a tunnel, giving the impression to unaware guests that this will be the nature of the entire attraction. However, a short way in, Mickey’s car accidentally hits a switch, causing the locomotive to go one way, with the rest of the cars splitting up and careening off the other way.
This begins a series of brightly colored and beautifully animated set-pieces, all of which have their own gimmicks and pitfalls. You’ll travel through a desert in the American west, a carnival struck by a tornado, a tropical island, underwater, a city street, and many more surprises. I know there has been a lot of controversy lately over projection-heavy attractions, but honestly, I don’t know how this attraction could have been done better. The projections are so clear and vivid that you really feel like you’re inside a Mickey Mouse cartoon short, and there are many visceral and dimensional effects to compliment the visuals.
As a ride system, the trackless dark ride is a fun and sometimes thrilling way to move guests through an attraction. It removes the visual obstructions that an Omnimover creates, it leaves the riders unaware of what’s coming next, and it has a high capacity, so even the longest lines will move relatively quickly. If you only do one of these on your next visit, and height restrictions aren’t an issue, I highly recommend Rise of the Resistance. Runaway Railway is a close second and is better for smaller, less thrill-seeking guests. It also typically has the shorter wait and cheaper Lightning Lane of the two. Ratatouille is still great, and being one of the few rides in Epcot’s World Showcase, you’ll probably end up on it anyway, but it’s the lesser of the three trackless dark rides.
Shows and Nighttime Spectaculars
The last time I visited Walt Disney World in December 2019, there was Happily Ever After in Magic Kingdom, Epcot Forever in Epcot (obviously), Star Wars: A Galactic Spectacular and Fantasmic! in Hollywood Studios, and a variety of Tree of Life Awakenings in Animal Kingdom. All of those closed with the parks in 2020, and only three parks have restored nighttime shows since then. Of those three, two shows were replaced for Walt Disney World’s 50th Anniversary.
So let’s get the old out of the way first. The Tree of Life Awakenings is a series of projections and light shows on the front of the Tree of Life visible from the main intersection on Discovery Island. The music and the ways the projections use the shape and depth of the Tree’s structure can be impressive. However, it’s hard to see past the fact that the elaborate carvings in the Tree cause the projections to ripple and detract from the effect. The Tree being so far away from the guests alleviates this problem somewhat, but also makes the projections themselves harder to see. Stop and watch one if you happen to be in the area, but they’re not worth scheduling your day around.
The next nighttime show I saw was Harmonious. Now, I’m gonna be frank — IllumiNations: Reflections of Earth is a tough act to follow. There’s a good reason it ran for over 20 years. Epcot Forever was a fun nostalgic temporary replacement, but Harmonious is something completely different altogether. Like Epcot Forever, Harmonious does away with the globe that had been the centerpiece of every iteration of IllumiNations since 1988. Instead, Harmonious uses wave-shaped LED panels surrounding a single circular projection fountain, with several other fountains featuring moving arms positioned around the massive show barges. These water features and screens are supplemented by fireworks, projections, and lasers, and the visuals are coordinated with medleys of songs from various Disney animated films.
The imagery of this show is bright, colorful, and often beautifully designed abstractions of the movies, characters, and scenes they represent. They often incorporate elements from the real world cultures of the stories’ origins, and the familiar Disney songs are presented in lushly reorchestrated renditions using culturally appropriate instruments, arrangements, and vocalizations, both in their characters’ native language, and also with the English lyrics (sometimes alternating between them). Altogether, this is the best way I can think of to incorporate recognizable Disney IPs into a World Showcase show — something Frozen Ever After and Remy’s Ratatouille Adventure fail to do on most accounts.
While the show as a whole is quite good, and the Disney elements are tastefully incorporated into the World Showcase aesthetic, the overall presentation feels like it’s missing something that Reflections of Earth had unequivocally — a theme, a story, or some kind of message — something to tie the whole experience together. While Harmonious does end with an original refrain about togetherness (the “us” in “Harmonious“), this concept is absent from the rest of the program, which mostly feels like a collection of Disney songs loosely tied together by geography. Not that there really needs to be a story, per se. No fireworks show prior to Wishes and Reflections of Earth has ever attempted to have one. It’s just that without one, it feels more like a 20-minute-long ad for Disney movies and not so much like an Epcot World Showcase Nighttime Spectacular. Yes, the music is arranged by country/continent/global region, but there’s no narration or thematic musical or visual transition that tells you that, so the whole thing ends up feeling disjointed.
From sundown to park close, when Harmonious and its postlude are not occurring, the show barges are lit up as a radiant water feature. During the day, however, the oversized barges are a huge eyesore in the middle of the World Showcase lagoon, visible from anywhere around the promenade. For the resort’s 50th Anniversary, they are lit up with the celebration’s “EARidescent” colors and logo, but that’s really just putting lipstick on a pig. Ever since it was announced that these barges were going to be permanently parked in the middle of the lagoon, I couldn’t help but wonder why. Every iteration of IllumiNations had barges in the lagoon, but they were ferried out every evening around sunset and removed every night after the park closed, allowing for an unobstructed view across the World Showcase the rest of the day. Maybe there’s a good reason the same can’t be done with these, but it baffles me that Disney didn’t bother to find a better solution.
In Magic Kingdom, the beloved Happily Ever After nighttime spectacular has been replaced with Disney Enchantment. In nearly every respect, Enchantment is Happily Ever After 1.5: a combination of Disney movie music, elaborate projection mapping effects, and pyrotechnics; the differences being the content itself. All the songs and images have been completely replaced with new music and projections. Also, for the first time in Florida’s Magic Kingdom, projections stretch all the way down Main Street.
The show starts with its new theme: You Are the Magic, then proceeds into yet another playlist of Disney music before culminating in a triumphant reprise and the appearance of Tinker Bell for the finale. The projections feature a mix of original and classic animations and special effects from their respective movies, and most of the songs have been rerecorded with more “epic” orchestrations and vocals by soloists Philip Lawrence and Kayla Alvarez.
Now, again, like Harmonious, aside from the technology used, Enchantment seems to have more of a thematic resemblance to the classic Fantasy in the Sky than the more recent Wishes and Happily Ever After in that there is no story or emotion to tie the various music and imagery together. It’s just a mostly disconnected string of Disney songs and movie clips. There also weren’t any standout moments like when the castle itself sang the acapella outro to That’s What Friends Are For from Happily Ever After. That’s not to say the show was completely flat. There were moments that caused me to well up, especially the finale; but like Harmonious, I left the show feeling like I had just stood through a Disney music playlist on shuffle rather than being taken on an emotional and memorable journey.
Finally, I have to mention Animal Kingdom’s new Daytime Spectacular, Disney KiteTails, which is presented several times a day in the same amphitheater originally built for the short-lived Nighttime Spectacular, Rivers of Light. KiteTails once again plays music from Disney movies, while various forms of kites and floats soar over the audience’s heads — or sometimes crash land on top of them (intentionally, apparently)!
There are actually multiple variations of KiteTails based on different Disney animated musicals featuring animals. The one we saw was The Lion King, and unfortunately we didn’t get to see it from the amphitheater, but from the waterside Flame Tree Barbecue dining area across the lagoon from it. Maybe not being in the middle of the action was detrimental to the experience, because the whole thing was really — well, lame. The “kites” were basically deflated parade balloon floats flown around the lagoon tied to speedboats moving fast enough to fill them with enough air for them to take recognizable shapes. These water-based kites were supplemented by smaller, more solid kites on long rods that were controlled by cast members running around the amphitheater.
The whole thing just reeked of frugality and insincerity, as if the Imagineers in charge just threw their hands up and said, “well, we spent millions of dollars building this venue for a show nobody bothered to see, and management says we need to replace it, so we’ll just wave some brightly colored nylon over the audience while we play canned music for 15 minutes. That’ll fill the space and cost us nothing.”
Seriously, don’t go out of your way to see KiteTails. You can catch glimpses of it as you walk between Dinoland and Asia, or watch it from the Flame Tree seating area. It’s disappointing enough that they got rid of Rivers of Light. KiteTails is just a slap in the face — sometimes literally.
Dining
This pains me to say, but despite months of trying, we could not get a reservation for Space 220. That’s probably the biggest disappointment of the trip. I had wanted so badly to eat there, but it was not to be. We did, however, get to have a few other new and notable dining experiences, and I was able to check off a couple of bucket list items, so I will try to briefly go over the highlights here.
Our first day at Walt Disney World was spent at Epcot, and we ate at one of the few elusive dining experiences I had never had before this trip, the Coral Reef Restaurant at the Seas pavilion. For those of you who are unfamiliar, the Coral Reef is located just below ground level, inside the Seas pavilion, with large windows into the aquarium. During our meal, we saw many varieties of fish, some sharks, some rays, and even a diver — though, sadly, no scuba-diving Mickey.
The food there is mostly seafood, as can be expected, although there are a few chicken and steak options. I had the lobster bisque and seared salmon, both of which were delicious. I finished my meal with the Chocolate Wave cake. Although the food was good, the obvious highlight was the view. All of the booths are positioned to face the windows, and all the tables have unobstructed views. It was a unique and memorable experience, but not necessarily one I feel the need to come back to repeatedly.
The next day, in the Magic Kingdom, we ate at another restaurant that was new to me, The Plaza Restaurant on Main Street USA. The Plaza is definitely more of a casual dining experience. If Coral Reef is Red Lobster, The Plaza is Denny’s. But The Plaza has something I had always heard about but never tried: the Monte Cristo.
The third best way to understand what a Monte Cristo is is to read the description on Disney’s official site:
Deep-fried in Funnel Cake Batter with House-made Bacon, Roasted Turkey, and Provolone sprinkled with EARidescent and Powered Sugar with a side of Strawberry Jam
image source: The Disney Food Blog
A light, low-calorie meal this is not. Do not eat this if you are health-conscious. Do eat this if you like delicious food that may shorten your life but increase its quality. Just writing this review is making me hungry for another one. If this description whets your appetite at all, you have to try one. It’s really a shame that the Plaza and Bar Riva at Riviera Resort are the only places on property where you can get one because these would be great quick service sandwiches. They should add these to the menus at Cosmic Ray’s, Connections Café, Sunset Ranch Market or Woody’s Lunch Box, and Restaurantosaurus.
We ate at Maria & Enzo’s Ristorante at Disney Springs one night, The Boathouse on another. Maria & Enzo’s was pretty standard Italian-American cuisine — nothing too exciting, but everything was good, and the atmosphere was really neat. The dining room was designed to look like an airport in the early 20th century. I had the ravioli and a Maple Syrup Bourbon Old Fashioned.
We had actually eaten at The Boathouse on our last trip, but since it’s still relatively new, I’ll mention it here. Like Maria & Enzo’s, you’re not getting anything too out of the ordinary here. The Boathouse is run by Landry’s, so if you’ve eaten at Rainforest Café, T-Rex Café, Yak & Yeti, or any of their dozens of other restaurants outside of Walt Disney World, you’ve got a good idea of what you’re in for: good-but-not-great food for above-average prices in a themed dining area. The Boathouse is all-American food with a nautical theme. You will leave full and satisfied, and probably forget the whole experience immediately after.
Another bucket list dining location I was able to get into was Oga’s Cantina at Star Wars: Galaxy’s Edge. Oga’s is more of a bar than a restaurant. The only food items were the Batuu Bits (chips and dip) and the Happabore Sampler (a charcuterie board of sorts). We got the Happabore Sampler, and it was a mistake. The meats were bland, except for what we could only assume was spam. There were some cheeses and dips that were okay, but between the tastes, price, and portions, it was an absolute waste of money.
The drinks, on the other hand, were totally worth it! I had the Fuzzy Tauntaun, a sweet, citrusy cocktail with a “Buzz Button Tingling” foam topping that has to be experienced firsthand. My wife had a Jedi Mind Trick, which was also sweet and fruity. The kids had the non-alcoholic Jabba Juice and Carbon Freeze, which were basically everything sugary you can think of.
The real draw of Oga’s Cantina is the theming. Meant to be reminiscent of the Mos Eisley Cantina from A New Hope, like the rest of Galaxy’s Edge, you really feel like you’ve been transported to an alien world in the Star Wars Universe. Strange and funky beats are spun by DJ-Rex, an animatronic droid based on R-3X, captain of the Starspeeder 3000 from the first iteration of Star Tours, and voiced by none other than character actor (and Pee-Wee Herman) Paul Reubens. Unfortunately, we were seated in a booth right next to Rex, so his music and dialogue were significantly muted, and the droid himself was not visible from our location. I would definitely try to return for the drinks and a better seat, but unless the food options are improved, I would steer clear of them.
Our last meal worth mentioning was Cinderella’s Royal Table, the signature restaurant located on the second floor of Cinderella Castle. This was my second time eating there, and the first for the rest of my family. We had hoped for a breakfast meal, but could not nab a reservation, so we ended up having lunch instead. I had the Magic Carpet Ride, which is a dish of pork tenderloin and belly, with carrots and couscous on the side.
As a whole, the food was… good. It wasn’t great. On my previous visit I had a Turkey Pot Pie, which I vaguely remember being better than my Magic Carpet Ride meal, but to be honest, both times I found the food selections at Royal Table to be off-putting and underwhelming. I understand that as a highly sought-after signature dining experience, Royal Table needs to have a high-class menu, but both times they have been bland and, frankly, “too fancy” for family dining. Both Storybook Dining at Artist’s Point and California Grill have more flavorful options that are less likely to turn off casual American diners like my children and mother-in-law.
As an experience, I feel like everyone needs to eat in the Castle at least once, but if you can, try to get in on breakfast. I haven’t had it, but it definitely sounds more appealing.
Finally, I want to mention the food and beverage options at our resort, Disney’s BoardWalk. We had a few meals and drinks on the boardwalk during our stay, most notably, a table service breakfast at Trattoria al Forno, which was good, and reasonably priced, but marred by the absence of characters (formerly, Ariel, Rapunzel, Eric, and Flynn visited guests’ tables for meet and greets), and a resort-wide test of the fire alarm system, which was in no way the restaurant’s fault.
We also had cocktails at AbracadaBar and Leaping Horse Libations, which were on par with pretty much any other Disney adult beverage offerings in that they’re a little pricey, but they’re strong, flavorful, and go down easy. AbracadaBar in particular was a fun experience. There are several hidden features pertaining to magic and magicians, and if you can find them all (without cheating), you get a prize! We also ordered pizza from the Pizza Window outside Trattoria al Forno. As a native New Yorker, this is the place to go on property for authentic, thin-crust, New York style pizza. The full pies were practically perfect, and the individual slices were delicious and huge — about a quarter of a full pizza!
The To-Go Cart on the boardwalk is fine if you’re looking for standard American food, like burgers, hot dogs, chicken, and barbecue; but it is overpriced, even for Disney standards, inefficient, and not actually run by Disney, so mobile ordering and MagicBand charging are not options. There also aren’t many places to sit and eat nearby, so we ended up sitting on benches and in the grass (nay, AstroTurf) and eating off our laps.
Last, but not least, is the BoardWalk Bakery and BoardWalk Ice Cream (same location, but listed separately for some reason), which offers variations of the same desserts and pastries found throughout Walt Disney World. This is also where you’ll purchase and refill your souvenir mugs.
Unlike most other Disney resorts, the BoardWalk does not have a cafeteria-style eatery where you can grab snacks and quick service meals, so if this is something you typically look for, you may want to consider staying elsewhere.
Disney’s BoardWalk Resort/Villas
Aside from the aforementioned lack of a food court, in nearly every way, the BoardWalk lives up to its Deluxe status. One could practically make a vacation out of staying at the BoardWalk and partaking in the many amenities of the resort and surrounding resort area without visiting the parks (but who would want to, especially at those prices?). The boardwalk itself is lined with places to eat, drink, shop, and party, day or night. Streetmosphere entertainers perform nightly, and carnival games are available to provide that authentic Coney Island feel. There were several other places of interest that we didn’t have time to visit, including a dance hall and a piano bar.
The Luna Park Pool is quite large and features a water slide, a playground, a splash pad, a hot tub, and a bar. There are also a couple of quiet pools elsewhere at the resort, but we didn’t visit those. It’s a relatively short walk from the resort to the International Gateway at Epcot’s World Showcase, a pleasant but significantly longer walk to Hollywood Studios’ main entrance, and pretty much every other location throughout Disney World can be reached via Friendship Ferryboat, Skyliner, or Bus Services. And since it’s less than a mile from the geographic center of the Walt Disney World Resort, travel times to even the farthest destinations are minimal.
The best part of the BoardWalk Resort is just walking along the boardwalk at night. Everything is lit up with bright white lights, you can see the Yacht and Beach Club across the water, as well as Spaceship Earth glowing on the horizon. You can even see fireworks from all three theme parks almost every night.
If you’re willing and able to splurge on a Deluxe resort and don’t mind not staying in the Magic Kingdom area, the BoardWalk is an excellent option. Only the Beach Club would top it due to its closer proximity to Epcot and the Skyliner, and its exclusive sand-bottomed pool (which it shares with its adjacent but further west resort, the Yacht Club).
Disney’s Skyliner
Due to the more convenient Friendship Ferryboats and the fact that we had no reason to go to any of its stops, we didn’t really get to fully utilize the newest Disney Transportation system, the Skyliner aerial gondolas. I did, however, insist that we ride it once, when returning to the BoardWalk from Hollywood Studios — although there is no direct route between the Studios and BoardWalk, so we had to take it from the Studios to its junction point at Disney’s Caribbean Beach Resort, then transfer to another gondola to reach the Epcot International Gateway station across the river from the BoardWalk.
In my opinion, the Skyliner is easily the best way to travel around Walt Disney World. You don’t have to wait 20+ minutes for the next vehicle, you aren’t going to be crammed in like sardines with a bunch of strangers, it never stops (unless it has to for an emergency), it’s clean, quiet, fast, efficient, and fun. It also gives you some of the best views of the property outside of the Monorail and the handful of really tall attractions and resort towers. I hope Disney will expand the Skyliner in the not-too-distant future to reach the Kingdoms (Magic and Animal), and especially Disney Springs and its resort area.
My Impressions Overall
Walt Disney World is still The Most Magical Place on Earth, and I will always be happiest there. During this trip, I even had the opportunity to wander around Epcot and the Magic Kingdom and take photos after dark, one of my favorite past times. Some of those photos are included in this post. Others will be uploaded to the site’s Photos section as soon as I have time in my life.
That being said, as joyous as it is just being there, there was also a general feeling of fatigue, both with my family and within the place itself. Cast members were, in general, less friendly, and less willing to go out of their way to create magic. And I get it. It’s been a rough couple of years, and cast members are overworked, underpaid, overstressed, and only human. I can’t blame them for not always bringing their A-game, and to be fair, it’s not all of them. Our waiter a Cinderella’s Royal Table in particular was lots of fun and great with the kids.
There’s also a significant increase in both prices and surcharges and a decrease in amenities. No more Magical Express meant we needed to hitch rides with a local friend. No Dining Plan meant that we couldn’t budget our meals and snacks ahead of time. Genie+ and Lightning Lane are an additional expense that added an extra $100 a day on average to the whole trip. Food and beverage prices have increased across the board, as have admission and lodging.
Most of Epcot’s former Future World area is still under construction, two of the four new attractions announced at D23 2017 still have no opening date; one has been postponed, downgraded, or canceled (Disney hasn’t officially said yet); and a major refurbishment has been put on indefinite hold. Magic Kingdom still does not have a nighttime parade (although the midday Festival of Fantasy has finally returned, a little over a month after our trip), none of the other parks have had any parades for years, and Fantasmic! is still closed (recently announced to be reopening later this year with new scenes).
Several of the existing attractions were in a noticeable state of disrepair. Roughly half of the animatronics in Under the Sea ~ Journey of the Little Mermaid were inoperative, and a couple of ghosts were missing from The Haunted Mansion. The Shaman of Songs from the Na’vi River Journey was in B-mode during both of our ride-throughs on two separate days (the Shaman’s “B-mode” is just a projection of her that’s significantly smaller and farther away than the actual Audio-Animatronic), as was Kylo Ren from Rise of the Resistance (Kylo’s “B-mode” is also a projection, except he’s flying a TIE Fighter outside the windows of the Star Destroyer instead of standing in it a few yards in front of you).
Personally speaking, a bad day at Disney World is better than a good day anywhere else, and altogether, we had a good time. However, the combination of higher prices, reduced offerings, piecemeal amenities, and inconsistent quality control made this visit a little less magical than previous ones. While everything new is fun and exciting, there’s an element of malaise that taints the whole experience. While a good portion of that is undeniably COVID fatigue, there’s a general feeling that we were being taken advantage of permeating our vacation.
I’ve had this feeling before, in the years before Michael Eisner resigned and Bob Iger stepped up. The decade or so that followed that regime change was a mostly positive one. Hopefully, we’re on the cusp of another executive shakeup. With the exception of TRON Lightcycle Run, the updated Fantasmic!, and the completion of Epcot’s transformation, there isn’t much that I’m looking forward to in the near future — and two of those were supposed to be finished already.
All-in-all, our January 2022 Disney World vacation was a positive one, albeit bittersweet. It may be our last for a while — but we’ve said that before and continue to return, so a grain of salt is advised. The highs of our visit outweigh the lows as far as I’m concerned. I just hope that there’s a significant improvement in the way the parks and resorts are managed so we can continue to justify the money we’ve spent.
If you’re thinking of going to Walt Disney World, and are okay with missing anything exclusive to the 50th Anniversary celebration, I’d recommend waiting a year or two for TRON, Guardians of the Galaxy, the new Epcot hub, and several other upcoming updates to be completed, and for Fantasmic!, the Dining Plan, and character meals and meet-and-greets to return. If you absolutely need your magic fix as soon as possible, it’ll cost you, but I don’t foresee you having a bad time.
But if you do go soon, take me with you?
Please?
